Skip to main content

Anniversary, before and after kids..

The anniversary celebration is one such day every wife looks for. But after my first anniversary, I never had much expectation from my husband. I know how husbands change after marriage! And so I’ve never been the type to demand expensive gifts or elaborate displays of affection. But in a deep corner of my heart, I always wanted my husband to surprise me with his gestures of love on our anniversary and contrary, my husband being a non-romantic never did any such thing. No issues, I learned how to make myself happy when I want to. 

Then the day came when we became parents and my expectations changed a bit more. I accepted the fact that after having kids couples never get much kick to celebrate their anniversary. However, I didn’t anticipate that it would be so difficult to get five seconds for ourselves once we have a baby running around. In my post "How we think before and after becoming a Mother" I tried to depict how a mother's thought process changes after kids. And now have a look how our Anniversaries change after becoming parents:

Planning for celebration
Before : We spend a good amount of time in all planning and preparation. We often plan a weekend away or a romantic dinner at a favorite restaurant followed by drinks. We also plan for movie outing where we sit hand in hand with our spouse.
After : We rarely get a chance to go for dinner as we fear of our kids making disaster there. Many times husbands forget their anniversaries and wives pass the whole day in making them remember what is the date today!  
Movie outing
Before : If we decide to go to a movie with dinner, we go to the best of theaters and see something we both, husband-wife, have been waiting to see forever. Best of theaters means instead of classic and silver, we get tickets for comfortable lounge sitting.
After : There is absolutely no Outing now. We search for online movies that are less long because we can never stay up long enough for a full-length Bollywood movie. Even if we go for a movie, we often regret sitting there blinking at our babies continuously going to washrooms and asking for pop-corns.
Anniversary Shopping
Before : We probably buy a whole new outfit for the occasion with roaming store to store. Ladies spend hours doing your hair and nails. Husbands may not be much excited about shopping but they care what to wear when going out.
After: We use Online shopping option as we can't afford to go for a special shopping with kids. We get everything pre-ordered and sometimes shopping makes no sense. It's only anniversary, it comes every year!
Romance
Before : We try our best to behave romantic that day. And worth mentioning, so many LOVE YOU messages, bouquet,surprise gifts and lots of love expression. This is the day when we feel we are so fortunate to marry our partner.
After : Our idea of ultimate romance has completely changed. We want peace and good sleep. No messages and no flowers, and ladies like me buy their gift herself. And we often think why anniversary comes every year. Why not we married on 29 FEB (leap year) !
Remembering it
Before : We start marking calendar months before. We pre-plan things and may go for vacation. We write “anniversary” in big letters in our TO-DO list and color a little hearts around the day.
After : Many times we totally forget the day until we receive a call from a friend or family member. And God bless Facebook, we get reminders for anniversary also. Instead of feeling guilty that we forget our anniversary, we justify it saying “we have changed, we want every day as simple as it can be”.
Still, we count for our anniversary every year, at least wives do for sure!
Listen This Post Stop Listening Post

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

My 'Invisible' Accomplishments #DecadeHop #RRxMM

As we entered 2020, through this post I am trying to contemplate the coolest, most daring, and most significant feats of my life during the last decade. Now the more I regress my memory, the more I feel there are two types of achievements or accomplishments that I can ponder upon; Visible and Invisible. Visible ones are those that I can count on my finger like a parrot and others can nod also. I got specs on, married to a not-so-romantic man, produced a baby, started writing and added good 17 kgs in my body volume (I was 50 in 2011). However, there are many invisible accomplishments too that either I know silently or very few can assert. From 2011 to 2019, Who am I now From a coy soul to now an outspoken woman, the trek was not easy. I achieved it. From being a no-makeup girl to now a lipstick swatches observer, the transition was tough. But it happened. And from being a sweet hater to now a sweet lover, the change was mysterious yet occurred. And now I can die for Gulab Jamuns....

Cheap vs.Expensive Bottled Water-The Cost of What is Free & Essential

If I ask you when you last bought packaged drinking water last, I am sure you would not count it from long ago. Obviously, because gone are the days when we used to count water as a free goodie from nature for all of us. We now buy this essential for life thing in various amount as per our needs.  Be it a shopping mall or an amusement park, hospital or restaurant, travel time or even at home we pay for our drinking water. During Durgapuja festival I had to buy drinking water from many places which made me notice how the price of the same drinking water changes from one shop to another. Buying a one-liter bottle of a reliable brand from a general store cost me Rs. 20, while the same brand bottle of an equal amount of water filled inside a pizza hut store cost me RS. 50 on the same day. The last bottle that I had bought was left in the car parked outside and I felt thirsty again while waiting for my ordered pizza. This made me ask for water at the cash counter where the person o...

Vibhu and Web Series - Gullak is a cheering story

After watching Panchayat , I was again on a hunt for another web series that Vibhu (my 7-year-old boy) can also enjoy. Luckily I found one. It was again a neat and uncomplicated one. No abusive language, no inappropriate talks, and full of comedy, it was really fun to watch " Gullak " with Vibhu. Set in a small town in North India, this web series is about a middle-class Mishra family and their day-to-day struggles. Being a 90s kid, I have seen the craze for clay piggy banks, typically called Gullak. Be it any fair or festival, buying a clay piggy bank was a custom in families of North India (UP) during the early 90s. The Series is named Gullak as in the show, a clay piggy bank, is the narrator of the plot. The Mishra family includes a giving husband, Santosh Mishra; a sarcastically speaking wife, Shanti Mishra; and their two sons. Then there are nagging neighbors, demanding relatives, everyday life struggles, and lots of humor with all. The performance by everyone in the ca...