A few days back I read an article that in the US half of all mothers accepted that they have little to no retirement savings. And I felt this is not only about the US. In our country also, mothers generally don't plan their retirement and savings. When they are working, they continue spending their earning to support their husband in carrying out the family responsibility. It is also an assumed notion that women can't manage their cash well and they can't plan to save. Contrary, I feel mothers are better leaders and managers. They are traditionally raised to save, they are disciplined so that they teach their kids, and they are futuristic.  Still, primarily finances have been taken care of by the men of the family. Right in their own house, mothers face this gender discrimination when it comes to money matters. The monetary world is filled with faked barriers that prevent them from taking charge of their money. Many times they are not provided the knowledge to set their fi...

I am not the mother who.. I am not the mother who stayed longer with her newborn, I resumed office when he was barely 2 months old. I am not the mother who witnessed each of my kid's milestones, I got to know them when being told. I am not the mother who could tell breastfeeding stories, my child is a formula-fed gold. I am not the mother who keeps the house spotless, I let my son scatter toys and go overbold. I am not the mother who manages a detailed list for parenting chores, I often keep my to-dos on hold. I am not the mother whom people admire, I hear people calling me selfish and cold. ALSO I am a doting mother who tries to juggle between family and work every other minute.  I am a mother who watches silly cartoons with my boy.  I am a mother who repeatedly tells the same story every night.  I am a mother who cooks my son's favorite food every week.  And I am also a mother who is the closest person in my son's life! I am not the ...

The very thought of being away from my son all day long sometimes makes me feel low. Being a working woman, I seldom feel that my responsibilities as a mother remain overlooked. The talks of some non-working friends & family ladies add more to this worry of mine. Some of them never worked and many of them had to leave their jobs in order to fulfill the responsibility as a mother. My life often takes me to the thought of becoming a homemaker so that I can stay at home all the time for my son. However, at the same moment, I also realize my responsibility towards my family which includes my in-laws and my aging parents who need financial support from me. My role of being a working woman allows me to share the financial responsibilities of my husband. I have worked against all odds to make a career. So, how can I abandon all this? But should I not take better care of my family? When my boys was an infant, I saw him playing and enjoying with the family living in my neighborhood. He...

Dear Kid, First of all let me tell you that I am eagerly waiting to meet you. You might still be in diapers somewhere. Or, you would be enjoying the diaper free days (just like my boy) and would be finding reasons to hit the flush button in the bathroom . But soon we'll meet and I'll get the pleasure of having a daughter-in-law . So, welcome to the family dear! You are going to get a new mother, may not be as perfect as yours, but definitely a caring one! This may be too early to talk to you but darling time passes in blinks and I want to be prepared for your wedding with my son. I promise that I would give you the best man of your life. For this, I'll put my best efforts to help my son in finding you. I'll make sure that he understands the meaning of "being a Husband" which is one of the two most important titles a man carries in his life. Other is of course "Father". He will surely know that he has to carry two biggest responsibilities...

First of all, a few questions. How many clothes you wash every day? If not every day, how many weekly? Do you fold and put them immediately after drying? Or, you are like me, keeping them on your bed/sofa/chair for some time and then with laziness fold the whole load in one go? Kahani Shuruwat Se.. I never liked washing clothes using my hands. I am talking about the time when washing machines were rare. Initially, my parents did this for me and thus I never really needed to wash my clothes. However, in college, I had to do it because there was no one help me. After getting married, I got a washing machine, right on the day I landed in my Delhi flat and life seemed better with a washing machine. I was kind of a person who used to pile up clothes from Monday to Friday and then either on Saturday or Sunday I washed the whole lot in one go. Things were okay until someone came to my house and tripled the laundry load. Yes, I became a mother and having a kid increased my laundry 3 times...

Last night I had my husband's office mate and his family as our guests. They were curious to see how the flat is designed in our society and looked at what is where at our 2 bhk house. 2 BHK means we have two bedrooms in our house and a hall. While we have a little one who sleeps with us only, the lady questioned me about making the other bedroom as kid's room while we could have made that our guest room instead. Well, this is a question I was ready with the answer for as I had to face this several times before and I am expecting it to be repeated there for me in future too. I politely smiled at her and said, "I could not name it anything but the kid's room." I then explained her why. The wardrobe in that room is filled with stuff that I have to buy in bulk to keep it an economic purchase like, the baby diapers, baby wipes, and bags in which I dispose of them.  I also showed her how the wardrobe is filled with the clothes that are bigger in size for...

New Year 2018 has started, and one recent normal looking happening made me vision about one thing that I want to see improved this year. Parenting is achieving horizons of both the poles. Mothers, working, managing family and offices, are trying their best to prove themselves as a balance maker. One pole is family where you need mammoth of patience and sweet talks to manage scenes. The other pole, work, needs being strict with deadlines, commitments and your own goals. As a working mother, I expect some help from people around me as sometimes my two hands seem not sufficient to carry on with my double roles. And when people fail me, I feel we still are far behind in understanding words compassion and consideration. I take my son with me to office as my office also provides a daycare for women employees. Every other day, my boy sleeps during the bus ride and when office bus finally reaches the destination, I need to carry three heavy things. My 3-year-old son, his diaper bag and...

Mothers. We love them for many reasons. They brought us in this world, nurture us, mould us and support us whenever we need them. We owe our mothers big time. Right? Ever since our new Miss World Manushi Chillar has bowled judges of the pageant with her answer, everyone is going gaga over one old yet new topic "How much salary should be given to a mother?" Although mothers our there are doing their jobs selfishly and they never claim their dues, the reality is that the household tasks done by women are neither acknowledged as work nor do they get paid for them. A job where you work long hours, no fixed routine, no leaves, no promotion and extra work every now and then, I guess no one would like to apply for this strange type of role. Being a mother myself, I never thought if I should be paid for my hard work. This could be because I am a working mother. I already get paid for my work in my office and this works as a boost for myself so that I can keep myself moti...

Do you lie to your kids? What lies do you tell? And do they really count as lies?  Let me put an example here. "If you don't finish your food, you wouldn't be as tall as Papa". OR "If you hit your teddy, it will cry". For the first lie, I would say, it is partially true because eating food is important for our babies to grow up. However, even if our babies never eat a piece of Lauki, they will still probably grow big like their fathers. As per a research, lies are common among parents around the world. Point to be noted here is we teach our kids that lying is a bad thing, but we also believe it's okay to lie to them under certain circumstances. But do you think it is okay to lie to our babies? Are little white lies okay? As a mother, I care what I am saying to my son and as a toddler what he is going to understand. So I am not always truthful and upfront with him. Every day when I make my tot sleep timely, I explain to him that next morning we ha...

Today I am going to admit of what many parenting experts may consider wrong. I am an unashamed briber of my son and my husband also does that without thinking much about it. My son is not much fussy about eating but many times I say "Finish your plate and you'll get a Dairy Milk." Then happens when he is not ready to be quite while combing his hair, we use this bribing trick, "Once your hair are done, you'll get my cell phone."  I know the army of parenting gurus can be judgmental and they would criticize me that I am extrinsically rewarding my son. Rather than giving him intrinsic benefits, I am taking a wrong step of rewarding him based on his acts. To which I would say "Is that really so bad?" Sometimes kids are non-compliant, non-cooperative, who not only don't know what's good for them, they even don't go with what their parents think is good for them. For example, tooth brushing, getting homework done, sitting quietly, not j...

With a baby at home, we try to take extra caution when it's about cleanliness. We keep our houses clean, the floor gets mopping many times and bed-sheet gets changing timely. We sanitize baby clothes after washing with detergent. We use good quality dish wash to keep germs away from baby's feeding utensils. But we often overlook baby's toys. Babies are constantly touching toys, putting their hands over them (whether clean or dirty) and many times take toys in their mouths so they can pick up germs and diseases easily. Washing and disinfecting toys help reduce the spread of germs, especially when many children are together. This means we can reduce the possibility of our babies getting sick by keeping baby's toys clean. There are two basic steps to cleaning baby toys:  1. Cleaning:  Most simple way of cleaning toys. Scrubbing with soap and warm water can reduce germs from the toys. It also removes the grease and grime. 2. Sanitizing:  A ...

Social media is no longer a time-pass thing engaging only those who have leisure time after work. I know many people who are running their businesses on social media only making it a professional engagement too. They endorse their skills, products and business offerings here. For instance, many of the mommies I am in touch with are mommy-bloggers who use social media to promote their blogs. This has also become a profession for many of them who get paid for their blogs’ content and promotion. Social media also brings many other paid opportunities for people who have the desired kind of talent in them. My changed view about social platforms encouraged me to develop my social wings too. My raising social wings made me join Instagram recently. I followed many on Insta, mostly the fellow mothers, who are already popular Insta mothers. Honestly, I am a bit not set in posting my updates on this new platform as I am used to of posting my thoughts in clearly stated textual form inste...

We all have our favourite childhood memories and we love to recall them again and again. A few months back when I was at my mother’s place, my mother started telling me my childhood incidences noticing my son’s naughtiness. Although she has told me those tales many times yet I love listening to them more and more. When she was telling me how she spent those five days when I, as a newborn, was in the hospital, I realized that all my childhood memories are around my parents only. I find no one else in my memory clouds when I look back, although I used to die for many other family members. A Facebook post saying “ Kids don’t remember their best day of television ” suddenly flashed in front of me.  And then my guilt trip started thinking am I giving enough memories to my son for his future? I feel all SAH mothers are really lucky that they are participating in making beautiful memories for their kids. But for mothers like me who are working, the story is dif...